“Soup”
Monday, March 27th, 2006In the current generation of affluence and severe debt, we have all noticed “soupers.” These are people who go beyond normal enthusiasm and enjoyment of a hobby. I’m talking about people obsessed with cars, trucks, and motorcycles; it’s truly sad how someone with such good intentions can wreck something that was just fine in the first place. Let me clarify that I am not talking about making minor improvements, because I have done that, and it is fun to make improve your car to be the way you want it. It’s just that most people just wreck it when they do that. Of the many sub-groups of “soupers,” the most well known are the “ricers.”
Typically “ricing” is done to Japanese cars, and obviously that is where the name came from, but sadly it has spread like a virus to spoiled middle-class white kids and their Buicks. These are the typical The Fast and the Furious wannabes that you will sometimes see with sweet rims on the back of their cars and old stockers on the front (because they ran out of money). Other things they do to cut corners is use spray paint. Often in flat black. Honestly there is nothing worse that can be done to a car… or is there? Also, these guys always make sure to have the most annoying muffler possible on their 90 horsepower Honda to cover up the scraping noises it makes from being so low to the ground as it sputters down the road.
Then there’s the “choppers”… they make chopper motorcycles on shows like American Chopper. What I like most about these guys is that they all think they are being innovative. On the shows they are always portrayed as hard-thinking creative geniuses. So why then do all the bikes look the SAME!? They all think its cool to put skulls and tribal patterns and flames on their “custom” bikes. The same ideas go for the people that soup up semi-trucks.
Hot rodders and mud-slingers I find to be a little more worthy, because they do their work for nostalgia and/or power and fun. But still… and don’t forget the “dubbers.” Their only goals are to put in the biggest possible wheels (a.k.a. rims or “dubs”), most possible DVD players, and coolest hydraulic or air suspension.
But finally, there are the people that just suck. Imagine: a Chevy Lumina van… yes, this looks bad. Hood scoops, ugh. Racing seats, HA! Ugly, ghetto 13″ chrome ‘alloys’ (that are really plastic wheel covers)… at least they aren’t spinners. All you need now is a huge aluminum spoiler (which would be completely useless) to complete it, but no. Instead, its The Imperial March blasting on a stock speaker system full-blast while cruising through the Sam’s Club parking lot.
